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2 O's 2 A's

by Ben Vanden Boogaard

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1.
Do you remember when I loved you; Back when your happiness changed mine? The world was once dark and grey But that changed the day I met you Cause your smile would make it shine Do you remember when I kissed you; The way I held you in my arms? The world was a distant place As our love was graced and guided And I’d keep your soul from harm But now I’m stuck here with regret Of all the memories and times we shared I can’t forget Cause something inside makes me wanna hide from the love I used to know And these feelings still haunt my thoughts, my soul I can’t seem to let them go Do you remember when I told you? I told you that I needed time But you didn’t wait for me And when I could see you missing I wished that you were still mine But now I’m stuck here with regret Of all the memories and times we shared I can’t forget Cause something inside makes me wanna hide from the love I used to know And these feelings still haunt my thoughts, my soul I can’t seem to let them go Do you remember when I loved you Back when your happiness changed mine
2.
I wish you’d get married tomorrow So I’d never feel like tonight Back on your hook, recast your line Cause your feelings don’t reflect mine And I never thought I’d be on your line again I guess it doesn’t matter just how much time has been Since the moment I loved you last, I thought I moved on, I’m proved wrong I never should've gazed into your eyes, but I’ve always been a fool for you So it’s no surprise that my hope still rests in you It’s no surprise, that distance doesn’t matter your fondness never grew Why can’t it just sink in Cause it’s no surprise Your love is what I can’t win Some things are better left unsaid And I learned that the hard way When it blew up in my face Another shot that I won’t chase Yet I never want to lose to my pain again I’m always trying too hard if there’s a game to win But for once in my life I won’t, I need to move on, cause you’ve gone On to better things and other guys, and holding on makes me a fool So it’s no surprise that my hope still rests in you It’s no surprise, that distance doesn’t matter your fondness never grew Why can’t it just sink in Cause it’s no surprise Your love is what I can’t win And I always talked you up in my mind as the girl I hoped you could be But I’m done wishing you’ll be that for me And still it’s no surprise that my hope still rests in you It’s no surprise, that distance doesn’t matter your fondness never grew Why can’t it just sink in Cause it’s no surprise Your love is what I can’t win And I never thought I’d be on your line again I guess it doesn’t matter just how much time has been Since the moment I loved you last, I thought I moved on, I’m proved wrong I never should've gazed into your eyes, but I’ve always been a fool for you
3.
Coffee 03:39
I think that I’ll start drinking coffee every morning Cause bitterness is something I have learned to crave And my heart needs healing through a daily cup of morphine Oh this broken heart’s got nothing left to save Or maybe I’ll start drinking alcohol this instant And drown my blood with toxins numbing all this pain Cause a drunken heart can block out feeling reminiscent And I know, my past mistakes leave me with all the blame Now I’m stuck here with this hole That I’ll try to fill inside me, leaving me with no control Cause when you left, I hoped you’d come right back But I didn’t wanna chase you And still I try, to find me some piece of mind But I can’t replace you I think that I’ll start drinking coffee this morning Cause it’s been too hard to wake up living here alone And I’ll surely freeze this winter without you to hold me Cause it’s plain to see that you’re not ever coming home Now I’m stuck here with this hole That I’ll try to fill inside me, leaving me with no control Cause when you left, I hoped you’d come right back But I didn’t wanna chase you And still I try, to find me some piece of mind But I can’t replace you And when you left I felt so naïve Because our love was all I believed But I’ve learned that people are just people trying to make it through And we all depend on something, and for me, that was you Cause when you left, I hoped you’d come right back But I didn’t wanna chase you And still I try, to find me some piece of mind But I can’t replace you x2 Background Vocals: (Cause when you left I started to think I'll start drinking coffee To warm my cold and empty heart and fill it with some coffee Replace you with some coffee)
4.
Who You Are 03:30
The way you smile scares me half to death But it makes me feel alive the way you rob me of my breath I’m not quite sure what draws you to my mind But that’s what I’d like to find I wanna know the stories behind your eyes And what has gotten you this far? Despite my struggle you took me by surprise I wanna know just who you are The way you melt my heart each time you sing Oh it makes me wonder how you make me forget everything Love is a labor that I’ll never comprehend But I’ll slave until the end I wanna know the stories behind your eyes And what has gotten you this far? Despite my struggle you took me by surprise I wanna know just who you are I wanna know exactly how I feel inside Cause curiosity is difficult to hide No matter what I do I’m always craving more I think you’re what I’m looking for I wanna know the stories behind your eyes And what has gotten you this far? Despite my struggle you took me by surprise I wanna know just who you are
5.
This Moment 05:42
When I first looked into your eyes I was met with paradise And as quickly as a smile lit up your face I knew my heart was yours to take Cause love is a puzzle And we’ve both got a piece We all start with just a half And now ours is complete And you held the key That unlocked my soul And I’ve waited so long Now I finally know That this is the moment I’ve waited for my whole life And your love is the only thing That could ever feel this right Right here, here in this moment with you There’s nothing I could forget about a night like this I will always love you Like I do, here in this moment with you I will swear on my life, til the day that I die To always feel like I do Here in this moment with you When I wake in the morning I wanna be right next to you Whether sunshine or storming There’s nothing we can’t sustain through Yes this is the moment I’ve waited for my whole life And your love is the only thing That could ever feel this right Right here, here in this moment with you There’s nothing I could forget about a night like this I’ll always love you Like I do, here in this moment with you I will swear on my life, til the day that I die To always feel like I do Here in this moment with you But In life there will be struggles that we’ll have to juggle Rockblocks and rubble that we’ll have to rise above But above it all we must fulfill our call To take an obstacle and turn it into lessons learned and strengthened love Cause you’re my best friend and my one true love I will never say “I Love You” quite enough Because just three words can’t possibly define How I’ll always feel until the end of time Right here, here in this moment with you There’s nothing I could forget about a night like this I will always love you Like I do, here in this moment with you I will swear on my life, til the day that I die To always feel like I do Here in this moment with you
6.
My Love 03:21
My heart is stuck between Sweeping up a damsel or waiting for a Queen It’s taking too much time To find a love that’s truly mine I’ve been, looking for love in all the wrong places Rushing the process, only leaves traces On my heart, now broken apart, without love to fill the spaces Now I’m, taking my time and I’m waiting in line Praying to God that someday she’ll be mine Now I see, it’s all meant to be, and I’ll wait here until I find My love, my love, my love, my one true love My love, my love, my love, my one true love My queen will show her face When i least expect it I'll fall into her grace Until then I will wait Because patience is the main proponent of fate I’ve been, looking for love in all the wrong places Rushing the process, only leaves traces On my heart, now broken apart, without love to fill the spaces Now I’m, taking my time and I’m waiting in line Praying to God that someday she’ll be mine Now I see, it’s all meant to be, and I’ll wait here until I find My love, my love, my love, my one true love My love, my love, my love, my one true love It’s hard to trust it will all work out When the love you lost fills you with such doubt But I won’t give in, to the pressures I feel Cause at the end of the line is a love that’s finally real I’ve been, looking for love in all the wrong places Rushing the process, only leaves traces On my heart, now broken apart, without love to fill the spaces Now I’m, taking my time and I’m waiting in line Praying to God that someday she’ll be mine Now I see, it’s all meant to be, and I’ll wait here until I find My love, my love, my love, my one true love My love, my love, my love, my one true love
7.
The Port 05:47
I took my love down to the Port Where the water rose as my breath fell short And the lighthouse gazed upon us as we held hands by the sea It had never seen perfection quite like her and me We talked for hours through a screen window When I snuck out late, in the middle of the night, I was jealous of her pillow And the crickets sang around us as we whispered through the night The song of heart’s desire was a tune I could recite Oh, I can’t stop loving you No, I can’t stop loving you Oh, I can’t stop loving you No, I can’t stop loving you The stage was set, the lights were low Like the love we shared: hidden, yet with a glow And we sang along our favorite songs, of love through long distance Cause reuniting always brings the path of least resistance Oh, I can’t stop loving you No, I can’t stop loving you Oh, I can’t stop loving you No, I can’t stop loving you I lost my love down at the Port And her ship set sail and headed forth Still I check the coast, though it’s always clear, and yet these feelings still remain Cause letting go is a concept that my brain just can’t retain Oh, I can’t stop loving you No, I can’t stop loving you Oh, I can’t stop loving you No, I can’t stop loving you
8.
All Of Me 03:44
I thought I loved you in summer My heart would swell I recall I even thought that you might love me But you felt nothing at all So when you think back on what might have been Remember that you pushed me away back then You could have had all of me Since the day we met I always dreamed of what we could be Cause we make a perfect match, if I tear you are my patch So why can’t you see? That you could have had all of me You were the girl that I dreamt of And flaws were something you lacked But now I see you just as you are My whole perception has cracked So when you think back on what might've been Remember that you pushed me away back then You could have had all of me Since the day we met I always dreamed of what we could be Cause we make a perfect match, if I tear you are my patch So why can’t you see? That you could have had all of me So now how does it feel to know nothing about me? I bet you’d act like you don’t care But I know better Oh I know better Yeah I know better I know so much better Cause it’s so plain to see that baby You could have had all of me Since the day we met I always dreamed of what we could be Cause we make a perfect match, if I tear you are my patch So why can’t you see? That you could have had all of me
9.
When you left so long ago, I was a mess And I swore I’d never forget, the way you looked in that dress And I dreamed of the day, when we’d reunite And now that it’s near, something’s never felt so right Cause now in my soul, is something I gave up coming true I finally realized, I’m not in love with you And we talked just yesterday, for the first time in years And nothing feels like it has changed, but I can’t forget all of my tears So you draw me in close, my guard starts to wear You set my heart on fire, and then left me without a care So now, girl, you’ll see, no longer a flame between us two Now that I finally realized, I’m not in love with you Like a moth that’s drawn to the lamp My demise is by default You’ll always be the lady, while I’m just a tramp I thought you were the one that I’d always love And for you I would’ve given it all I miss how it used it be, when we were young When I’d tell you I loved you more, but now I just bite my tongue We’ll never be the same, we can’t just turn back the clock You used to melt my heart, now it’s hardened like a rock It’s sad but it’s true, the love we once had is through And I finally realized, I’m not in love with you
10.
The Only One 04:52
I can’t shake the peace in your eyes As we'd lie together, the aqua left me paralyzed The grace of your touch, so soft and sweet I wrap my arms around you as we cuddle underneath the sheets I cling on to the moments that we held so dear We watched fireworks together celebrate New Years Oh, it was freezing out as we watched them from a parking lot And I can’t forget the moments when I held you dear We had slumber parties with our friends in Freshman year Oh, and we fit right together you head would rest upon my chest And I never thought it would come crashing down on my head But since it's been over there are things I never said You are the only one who loves all I am And the way you care is so blind It’s clear to see you’re one of a kind You are the only one I’ll miss over time Cause now that you’re not mine Will there be any love left to find? I can’t shake the tears in your eyes As it all was ending, you asked for one last kiss goodbye And I still recall, my weak reply When you asked for details, I couldn’t really pinpoint why But I still cling on the moments that we held so dear We went to Chula Vista where I played, you cheered Oh, and we stayed for free, a weekend at a water park And I can’t forget the moments when I held you dear I kissed you on the lips and made our feelings clear Oh, and we lit a flame with a futon kiss that made a spark And I never thought it would come crashing down on my head But since it's been over there are things I never said You are the only one who loves all I am And the way you care is so blind It’s clear to see you’re one of a kind You are the only one I’ll miss over time Cause now that you’re not mine Will there be any love left to find? Will I ever find the one To take my pain away? I promise I’d give her the sun If she would only stay I pray that I will get a chance To love with all I’ve got I pray with all my heart and soul God give me one more shot Cause I need love so badly Without it I’m insane And I know you loved me madly But I didn’t feel the same And it scares me half to death To finally let you go So if this is my last breath I think that you should know You are the only one who loves all I am And the way you care is so blind It’s clear to see you’re one of a kind You are the only one I’ll miss over time Cause now that you’re not mine Will there be any love left to You are the only one who loves all I am And the way you care is so blind It’s clear to see you’re one of a kind You are the only one I’ll miss over time Cause now that you’re not mine Will there be any love left to find? Cause now that you’re not mine Was yours the best love that I’ll ever find?
11.
Vulnerable 03:35
I am fragile And I have broken before Tattered or torn a thousand times I’ll never lock down My heart remains an open door I was born to be in love I’ll offer everything I am We may break, but there is beauty in the rubble Because love isn’t consummate Until you’re vulnerable 
I have courage What’s meant to be will find a way So I’m not afraid to go down swinging To find the love of which I pray I was born to be in love I’ll offer everything I am We may break, but there is beauty in the rubble Because love isn’t consummate Until you’re vulnerable Life is too short Not to be shared Hearts may break But they will repair I was born to be in love I’ll offer everything I am We may break, but there is beauty in the rubble Because love isn’t consummate Until you’re vulnerable I am fragile And I have broken before But that will never stop me from loving you Cause darling I love you
12.
Another year has passed, it was so fleeting A heart can only withstand so much beating Now a broken man has finally gained direction Hopes and dreams of a future life perfection But what I need Is to walk a path in which I do not lead Give me courage to change what I can Yet still accept that I’m just one man With serenity guide me to notice the difference between But I won’t come home Til I’m the man I wanna be For what I thirst can not be satisfied Still a glass of water leaves me feeling dry My intentions are bold, as I always was told My head is in the sky But what I need Is to walk a path which I do not lead Give me courage to change what I can Yet still accept that I’m just one man With serenity guide me to notice the difference between But I won’t come home Til I’m the man I wanna be No I won't come home Til I'm the man I wanna be And this life I chase can be Hard to reach and feel so empty I’m broken and useless on my own Still I ask you to take me as I am And you love me in every way you can You’re my saving grace, and I’ll never be alone Give me courage to change what I can Yet still accept that I’m just one man With serenity guide me to notice the difference between But I won’t come home Til I’m the man I wanna be No I won't come home Til I'm the man I wanna be Lead me on my way, please lead me

credits

released April 28, 2015

Engineered by Makoa Johnson and Alec Thicke
Co-Produced by Makoa Johnson and Ben Vanden Boogaard
Mixed by Makoa Johnson
Mastered by Ben Hogarth
Album Art by Yee Keing Yang

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Ben Vanden Boogaard Saint Paul, Minnesota

Ben Vanden Boogaard is a singer/songwriter homegrown from a Dutch village called Little Chute, Wisconsin. With influences comprising Jack Johnson, Jason Mraz, Ed Sheeran, and John Mayer, among countless others, Ben produces heartfelt songs that combine elements of clever wordplay, dynamic hooks, and emotionally relatable content. ... more

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